Journey to Nerima
by Thanat0s
Summary: The cast from Journey to the West meets up with Ranma and co. My first fic ever! Please be gentle. I have plot ideas. Check out Author's notes at end of Chp2 for details. ^ ^ thanks
1. Prologue A Pesky Problem Solved

Journey to Nerima  
by Wraith

Disclamer: Ranma 1/2 is not mine. Neither is Journey to the West.

" " - speaking | ' ' - thoughts | * * - actions

* * *

In the sky somewhere, three strange looking humanoids were cloud walking.

"Hey brother, where exactly are we going?" one of them who looked like a pig asked. "I'm getting bored as hell."

"Anywhere. Man it's been over 1000 years since we had any excitement at all. Ever since we got those stupid scriptures for Master nothing exciting happened since." a monkey-like cloudwalker replied. 'Well, World War II may be an exception, but it's too...technological for me. Magic is the key to excitement.' However his deep thought was interrupted by a loud shout. 'What the?'

"Hey Monkey!" A demon-like human suddenly whizzed next to Monkey on his cloud.

"What?"

"Did you hear? A demi-god was defeated a few days ago!"

"So what Sand? [Sand is a name] These things happen quite often. Why so excited?" Monkey snored.

"I'm not finished." Sand grinned. "This demi-god, Saffron I believe his name is, was defeated by a mortal. Apparently this mortal's powers are so great that they destroyed the land surrounding their fight. Jusenkyo, to be specific." 

"Saffron?! *sigh* I told my disiciple's disiciple's disiciple's....(repeat 416 times) disiciple to tell him not to understimate prospective martial artists. The kid just couldn't listen. Oh well, what's done is done. But this is interesting indeed."

"Who's this guy?" Pig asked. "Let me fight him. He seems like a worthy opponent."

"Urm...I'm not sure. But they live in Nerima, I'm sure of that. But in any case, it's just Saffron, so what if a mortal defeated him? He's not even worth our time."

"Aw come on! Let's just go please? I mean, we do need some excitement after all. Come on!" Pig started to descend with his cloud towards Nerima. Monkey and Sand sighed and had no choice but to follow him.

* * *

Meanwhile in Nerima, at the Tendo household...

"RANMA!" Akane yelled. "YOU BETTER TAKE BACK WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT MY PERFECT YAKISOBA!"

"Geez 'Kane! I wus being nice to ya. I was being nice to you saying that it doesn't smell right!"

"Arrgh....don't give me that bulls***! Try it then criticize!" Akane was practically fuming. Ranma could've sworn he saw puffs of smoke rising from Akane's head, but dismissed it, thinking it as his imagination. But that was about to change. And now folks, the classic foot in mouth comment.

"Fine I'll tell you the truth. it smells so bad it makes onions cry! And if it smells that bad, what makes you think I'll even taste it!?" 'Ouch that comment bites!' Ranma stuck out his tongue in a playful manner to assuage the hurtful comment, not that it help ease out Akane one bit. Sure enough, Akane took the tongue sticking out as more of an insult, and promptly summoned the largest mallet you'd ever see. Ranma became the first test subject ever from that mallet by having a nice ride to the sky. 

Somewhere in the kitchen, Kasumi noticed a bottle of half used tar. "Oh my, Akane must've thought this was oyster sauce."

'Wow...this feels like I'm flying Mach 3. Speaking of which, that shaver is pretty darn good. It is indeed a close shave.' Ranma was still flying when he noticed three weird looking people ... flying! But it's not courtesy of Mallet Airlines. They're controlling their flight! 'Dang. That mallet must've been quite big.'

* * *

"Hey check it out, Sand!" Pig laughed at Ranma who was currently 'flying'.

"Another cloud walker?"

"No idiot, somebody just hit this boy a bit too hard. I should find out who that person is. Hey you there!"

"What? Me?" Ranma reached the apex of his flight, then started going down.

"Yes you! Hey wait up!" Monkey, Pig, and Sand started to descend, following Ranma.

A minute later, a female Ranma rose up from the Tendo koi pond., but soon fell again with a huge pig on top of her. 'This is not my day. Hey isn't this Katsushita, Akari's champion sumo pig?'

"Pig, I can't believe even after so long you still crash land when riding on clouds." Monkey laughed. "Say, who are you anyway? It looks like you're a victim of a Jusenkyo curse."

"C...can't bre..breathe...get this damn pig of...offa m..m..me!" Ranma-chan tried to roll off in vain.

Pig chuckled. "Sorry." and got off Ranma-chan. "Hey you went to Jusenkyo!"

"Jeez! One question at a time. I'm Ranma Saotome, yes yes nice to meat y'all. And yes, how did you know?" Ranma-chan gawked. She realized it was the second time some outsider instantly recognized a Jusenkyo curse without her or some other Jusenkyo victim tell them.

Monkey laughed. "What do you mean how would I know! Of course I know! You don't live a few hundred thousand years for nothing! So you turn to a female when hit by cold water. Do you like the curse?"

"No of course not! And did you say a few hundred thousand years or was it just my ear?"

"You heard correctly. Now Ranma, can you give me a cup of cold water?"

"Um ok." Ranma quickly went in to the house, quickly greeting everyone, except Akane, who was still fuming after Ranma's little fiasco with what she thought was food. She went into the kitchen and quickly filled a large mug with cold water, and at the same time changing herself back to his original form. 'Few hundred THOUSAND years. They've gotta be crazy. Although I don't believe them, I have to admit it might be true. After all this place IS Nerima. Now why would those three flying freaks want cold water anyway?' he thought to himself. But something told him that the water wasn't for them to drink...something definetely more than just refreshing themselves. "Here you go," handing the mug of cold water to the trio.

"Thanks," Monkey replied. Then he started to recite an incantation. The area around them darkened while the cup shone a bright blue. Ranma closed his eyes as the light intensified. Thunder and lightning rocked the tempestous sky, making Kuno's lightning after saying "Blue Thunder of Furkinkan High" seem like an atomic bomb vs. a toy grenade.

"Oh my! What is going on outside!" Kasumi held on to a bar to keep herself steady.

"Ahh! I hate thunder!" Soun wailed. Soon a small flood started to ensue.

"Oh no not more trouble. Saffron was a pain. Now what?!" Akane trembled. She remembered her near death experience. It was Ranma's care for her and his "I love you!" speech that brought Akane back. She sighed. 'If only he didn't deny. Things could be so much more peaceful then. But now this!'

As soon as she said it, the darkness stopped, and Nerima was sunny once more. Kasumi stabilized herself, and got back to cleaning dishes. Soun tried to stop swimming in his own tears, but to no avail, and Akane stormed outside to check out what the hell was happening.

"Ranma! What new enemy did you-" Akane froze. She blinked. She gaped. 'It can't be. Can it be? It has to be!' With such a thought, she fainted. Ranma noticed her falling and sped off to Akane's side to ease her fall. He looked down at her face, admiring its cuteness and noticed something that only happened in his fantasies, only now it's reality.

'No way, this is a dream I'm having! I'll dive into the koi pond and wake up. Yea, that's it!' Ranma dove into the koi pond and jumped out. Monkey chuckled at everyone's reaction once Ranma got out.

He was still male.

* * *

Notes: My very first story written in my life. (If you don't count those stories you have to write in school). Please be easy on me! R & R...no flames but constructive criticism is welcome! Thanks. Oh yeah this is a little intro chapter so I guess this is a prologue. 


	2. Introductions

**Journey to Nerima**  
by Darth Wraith

**Disclamer: Ranma 1/2 is not mine. Neither is Journey to the West.**

" " - speaking | ' ' - thoughts | * * - actions

* * *

'Kami-sama!' Ranma was at a loss for words. 'Water + me = girl..I mean boy! I'm finally cured! Even when all hope was lost when Happosai drank the last known source of Nannichuan!' Turning to Monkey, Ranma practically kowtowed, muttering "thank you" all the way.

"Haha it's no problem. Just a bunch of amateur magic!" Monkey smiled. Sand knocked his head.

"Whaddya do that for?!"

"Ehem...we ARE Immortals and we've cultivated our coduct for a heck of a long time...even if it's prestidigitation to us it's godly magic to them." Monkey sighed. He kept forgetting the fact that they were pretty much gods, if not more powerful. However that didn't stop Pig who suddenly barged through, demanding rudely that they have vegetarian food for payment.

"Of..of course." Kasumi spluttered, and went back in the house to prepare a meal. Meanwhile Genma was wrestling Ranma to the ground, demanding how he got the cure. Suddenly Monkey nudged Sand, casting a warning glance at a window in the house. Sand realized that they were being heavily scrutinized, but by whom? Monkey nudged him again. "Don't worry, it's not an evil atmosphere, though I must say it's not a good one. I'll be back." Plucking a hair from his tail, he made a double of himself, who was watching a wet panda and a wet boy fighting, while Monkey changed himself to a fly and flew into the window.

* * *

Nabiki was reading her manga when she felt the house drastically darken and shake. 'What is this all about?' Whipping out a first-class video camera she recorded the scene of the creation of cursed water. 'This is gonna make me a lot of money. But what is that monkey or whatever doing with that water anyway?' As the camera rolled, she noticed the monkey splash Ranma with the water. 'Hehe, time for more pictures for Kuno-baby.' as she waited for Ranma to change form. Little did she know that a fly buzzed around the room.

Only this time, Ranma still stayed the same. Nabiki blinked. 'I swear that's cold water that monkey poured on Ranma! But why?' She hated being left out in the dark, so she kept looking out the window, wondering what in the world a monkey, pig, and an ugly freak do in her backyard. Her curiosity turned to antipathy after the pig rudely stepped forward and shouted for food. 'Oh no,' she thought, 'We're not some type of charity. Don't even think of trying to filch some food from us.' Nabiki turned away from the window and proceeded to the door. Suddenly the fly, who was really Monkey in disguise, turned back to his original form. He smiled inwardly noticing that Nabiki still didn't notice his prescence. Deciding to give a little scare, he spoke.

"Hello there, girl. Now what's with the intense glare at us from your window?"

"WHAT?!" Nabiki fell on her bed. She felt her heart jump at the sudden intrusion. She was shocked, and seething, definitely not the demeanor of the Ice Queen of Furinkan High. "HOW IN THE WORLD DID YOU GET IN HERE!?"

"I have my ways. Now what is it that you want to know? I'll tell you everything about us if that makes you feel better."

"Ok. Hold on...lemme write a list of questions." Nabiki pulled out some paper and a pen, and started to write furiously. She handed the paper to Monkey who facefaulted after seeing the list of questions.

1. Who the heck are you?  
2. Why are you helping us?  
3. Why do you look so ugly...like animals?  
4. How has life been like for you all?

But here's the killer demand...  
5. Give me 200,000 yen or else...  


"'Heh...no problem..." Monkey sneered. Nabiki blinked. "no problem at all..." Monkey pretended he took something out from his pocket (actually he plucked a few strands of hair) and took out 200,000 yen, all seemingly real. "Here you go. Now as for the other questions, is it ok if I tell everyone else? They deserve to know...and Pig can have his dinner." Nabiki nodded enthusiastically.

* * *

A few moments later at the backyard, Sand and Pig finally forced Genma and Ranma to separate. "Ya know Sand, if not for the looks, they are practically conjoined twins." Ranma glowered the pig. "And what's supposed to mean, P-chan?"

Pig sweatdropped. And started throttling Ranma, growling, "P-CHAN?! Do I look like a piglet to you?! Learn to respect your elders! And geez aren't you grateful for what we've done? All I ask in return is 500 bushels of rice and vegetables. Nothing more, nothing less." Ranma was about to give Pig a nice kick to his abnormally large stomach when Kasumi called out that dinner was ready.

"SWEETO! FOOD!" Everyone facefaulted. Happosai would've facefaulted too if it weren't for his nightly panty raids.

* * *

Monkey and Sand had to restrain Pig from gobbling all the food that was coming out from the kitchen, while Ranma and Genma continued with their argument/fight over the Jusenkyo cure. When the food finally came out, Pig took his tray and dumped all the food down his mouth to swallow, in record time as well. This triggered a chain reaction. Ranma and Genma momentarily stopped fighting, gazing at Pig who was still seated, though with no food on his tray. Akane nearly produced an extradimensional mallet to whack both Genma and Ranma when she noticed their blank stares at Pig. She too looked at Pig, and then the food. Nabiki watched with interest at the new group. Kasumi managed an "Oh my" before going back to the kitchen to get more food for the voracious pig. Finally Soun broke the eerie silence.

"Genma! Ranma! Looks like you need some more eating training! Ahhahahaahahah!" Tears started forming in his eyes. Ranma and Genma blinked. 'Even Picolet would've been beaten in no time at Martial Arts Dining by this pig.' Ranma thought. 'Hmm...looks like my boy needs more training.' Taking his chopsticks he made a grab for Ranma's food but was interrupted by Nabiki.

"Hey Ranma, Saotome-san, check out your tray." Ranma and Genma looked down and saw empty bowls and plates. Then looked across the table to find a grinning Pig. Monkey and Sand both bonked pig on the head, producing what looked like those chinese jugs that held wine. "Sorry about this. Anyway we haven't even introduced ourselves to y'all. I'm Sun Wukong, just call me Monkey. That cretin is Zhu Bajie, but call him Pig. And this demonic fellow here is Sha Wujing, known as Friar Sand. Call him-"

"Demon. Yea yea I got it." Akane finished.

"Um actually call him Sand." Monkey stuck out his tongue, "anyway, although we look evil we really do have good hearts. Scouts honor!" Mass facefault.

Ranma broke from his stupor and shook Monkey's hand. "Well that was quite an interesting day. I'm Ranma Saotome. Pleased to meet you. Don't worry about your face, we've seen worse. And once again thanks for the cure." Genma growled.

"You guys look like good martial artists. I'm Genma Saotome."

"Ohh! Can it be! Could this be the trio that can bind Akane and Ranma together so they can be wed! Oh happy days Saotome-san!" Soun cried hugging Genma, who unfortunately turned into a panda due to Soun's excessive tears. Monkey sweatdropped. Another victim? Meanwhile Kasumi stepped out of the kitchen with a 4-gallon bowl of rice and gave it to Pig, who gleefully finished the whole thing in about 0.44 seconds. "That's my father, Soun Tendo, and I'm Kasumi, his daughter," Kasumi said with a serene smile. Meanwhile the panda whacked Ranma with a sign saying [WHERE'S THE CURE BOY! YOU CAN'T HIDE IT FROM ME FOREVER!].

Sand chuckled. "Just how can you smile all the time...I mean amidst all the chaos in this house...you smile as if nothing happened. That is pretty impressive." Kasumi blushed slightly at the compliment.

"And I'm Nabiki!" Nabiki smiled, still trying to take in the fact that she was 200,000 yen richer. They all turned to Akane.

"Eh? Why's everyone looking at me? Oh yeah...I'm Akane. Nice to meet you all." Sand raised an eyebrow.

"Well now, formalities aside, our second question Nabiki wants answered is..." taking out the paper, Monkey continued, "Ah! Why do we want to help you? Well honestly to tell you the truth we haven't had any excitement for a really long time. We were getting bored as heck when I heard Sand talk about some demigod being defeated by a mortal or something like that, so we checked this place out. Now seeing you Ranma and your...father?" Monkey looked at Genma with a weird look. He noticed that they weren't alike in appearances, but the names seemed quite similar. "Anyway with the both of you having Jusenkyo curses I think we've hit the jackpot for excitement. Speaking of which...do you know who happened to defeat the demigod? I think his name is Saffron or something like that."

Ranma shuddered. "I did. I didn't just defeat him. I killed him."

"Nonsense! You don't need to feel ashamed of yourself. The kid deserved it. Besides he's not dead remember?"

"I guess that's true," Ranma sighed.

"Good job!" Pig exclaimed, "though for us to do something like that is...um how to say it...reputation ruining."

Akane looked up. 'That pig must have an ego three times the size of Ranma! How dare he say something like that! Ranma nearly died saving me and defeating Saffron, and now Pig thinks it's demeaning!' Visibly mad, a blue glow surrounded her body, and shouted, "And just what did you mean by that?!"

Sand quickly nudged Pig, reminding him that they were immortals and they were mere mortals. Pig muttered, "sorry I forgot." But Akane thought Sand was further insulting them saying that they were mere mortals. "HEY! Are you looking for a fight?!"

Pig brightened. "Come on my pretty let's see how good you are!" Pig didn't even take out his rake, insteading going into a fighting stance. Ranma sparked and got up, seething with deep fury. 'How dare that pig call her my pretty!' However Akane noticed Pig's chi. It was HUGE. She could've sworn it was ten times larger than even Saffron's chi. 'No that's an understatement. It's much larger than 10x larger.' It was a calm, dark blue chi as well, denoting confidence. Though visibly shaken by this revelation, her pride got in her way. Just as she was about to strike Pig, Monkey grabbed Pig and shouted, "You fool! You're not here to pulverize a town! We're supposed to explore and hopefully find some adventure, not go everyone destroying everything you can see! Also don't forget, you're a Buddhist monk! No advances towards women! Geez!" At the same time Ranma restrained Akane soothing her anger. Pig also relaxed and sat back down meekly. Genma too noticed Pig's chi and shuddered. 'No human can ever achieve that much chi,' he thought, 'yet that Monkey guy can easily dominate Pig as if he were a fly vs. a human with a fly swatter.' Ranma felt relieved that these three weren't after Akane. But what about him?

"Sorry about this," Monkey sighed, "Pig's just a little overexcited, that's all." The Saotomes and Tendos both nodded quickly, definetely agreeing. "Uh..n-n-no h-ha-ha-harm done." Genma trembled after pouring some hot water on himself.

"Anyway third question. Why are we so ugly? We were born that way, that's all. And finally our last question. How has life been like? Well...that's gonna take a while to explain..."

_~~One hour later~~_

"...and that's our story. Many centuries we flew, seeking excitement, but to no avail...until now."

Everyone gasped in admiration. 'Wow,' Ranma thought, 'so that's how Jusenkyo came to existence. Damn that Bull Demon King.'

'Oh my,' Kasumi thought, 'what a long Journey. Too bad Sanzang was a monk...he seems so mature and so...perfect for me. I would've like to know him. On second thought, he is a little coward. Nah he's an idiot after all.'

'Fools! Why don't they accept all those gold that have been offered to them!' Nabiki watched Monkey in disgust. 'Such a waste of cash...'

'Somehow I feel like Sanzang and Ranma is Monkey, always rescuing him. Ryoga is Pig, while Mousse is probably like Sand,' Akane thought. (Out of coincidence that Ryoga was portrayed as Pig ^ ^)

Their thoughts were interrupt when they heard a rustling in the bushes at their backyard.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTES

Ere...2nd chapter done. I still haven't really gotten a plot. Please review and give me ideas...I was thinking of taking away some old problems only to add new ones? WAFF is unlikely cuz I'll suck at those :(. Well anyway R & R, thanks!

Yes some stuff is probably a bit OOC for Ranma and Journey to the West, but hopefully it's not way outta whack.

Monkey carries a cudgel called As-You-Will cudgel...it's extremely powerful. He can pluck out hairs from his body and change it to whatever he wants. He's the most powerful of the three.

Pig is a decent fighter, although a Buddhist monk, cannot really contain his want for women. Friar Sand is also a decent fighter, but a bit shady. I'll have to see how he comes to play. So far he seems like Dr. Tofu. Both fighters at same level. Yes, all three are WAY too powerful for Ranma to beat...any ideas on what to do about that? No I don't intend to make them into enemies that's for sure.


End file.
